How To Talk So Little Kids Will Listen: A Survival Guide to Life with Children Ages 2-7
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How To Talk So Little Kids Will Listen: A Survival Guide to Life with Children Ages 2-7
- Brand: Unbranded
Description
If a colleague has made a grievous error, then give them a chance to be the hero. This is the same for children. Show your child how to make amends. The best chance to get a child to do something better is to give them a chance to redo what they just did. Give them a re-write. This way he or she can see there’s a potential actual to do good. Advises not punishing kids. “Can you remember being punished as a child? Did it inspire you to change your bad behavior” (88)? Yes, it did for me! And it did for many other kids I know! If a punishment doesn’t work, it’s because it isn’t harsh enough for the kid to care.
Make sure you have a short explanation of what the problem is. The problem statement has to be short and touch on how that problem affects you as the parent. Simplicity is key at this stage. The classic business statement is: “I’m not sure we’re asking the right questions, solving the right problem.” We do these things automatically—protect against sad emotions, dismiss what we see as trivial emotions, and discourage angry emotions. We don’t want to reinforce negative feelings.” Don’t bullshit them when you don’t know something; encourage them to ask friends or family who might have a better answer. One of these is the biological need for recovery time. When we get angry, our bodies are flooded with hormones.” The good thing about being a parent is that if you blow it the first time, you almost always get another chance.”
I can see that you don’t want to hold my hand. It makes your fingers feel squeezed. Let’s solve this problem…” One study found that when people are offered large monetary rewards to complete a challenge, their creativity and engagement in the task plummets. Rewards helped people perform well on some very simple mechanical tasks, but as soon as they needed cognitive skills, rewards interfered with their ability to function.”
Put an empty plate in front of your child and let him serve himself, or ask for what he wants if he’s too young to serve himself.” Kids need affirmation to build a healthy degree of self-esteem but don’t overdo it or they could wind up feeling like the world owes them everything they want. There’s a spectrum that starts at “confident” and ends at “entitled” — aim for the former. However, when we started implementing the strategies in the book and started saying: “Erik, it’s time to go upstairs. Would you like to go upstairs like a frog or like a cow?” Or if there is a book that we were reading that day and that he loves, we’d ask him to act like something in the book. For instance, the thing he’s really into right now is robots, because of his love for the book “ Love Z“. So if we say, “Doyou want to go upstairs like a robot?Or do you want to skitter like a mouse?” (because of his love for the book “ Mouse Mess“), and then he’ll skitter like a mouse upstairs. We don’t want to accept negative feelings because they’re so . . . well . . . negative. We don’t want to give them any power. We want to correct them, diminish them, or preferably make them disappear altogether. Our intuition tells us to push those feelings away as fast and hard as possible. But this is one instance in which our intuition is leading us astray.” Lean into the negative feeling, and work with it, not against it.I feel like shouting from the rooftops! “I’VE FOUND IT! I’VE FINALLY FOUND IT! THE SURVIVAL GUIDE TO PARENTING!” I want to tell every single parent I know about this book. I want everyone’s lives to be easier because of this book. I want this book to help change parenting in people’s homes the way it did for mine. I want others to feel the relief of FINALLY having some answers on what you should really do! Instead of saying, “you spilled the milk” you can say “I really don’t like it when milk is spelt”. Instead of being accusatory towards the other person with “You”, you’re saying “I” have a problem with that this technique. This technique is universally effective wherever people are involved. Try it with your kids.
- Fruugo ID: 258392218-563234582
- EAN: 764486781913
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